Progress Report: Emotions vs. Instinct

What is it about this time of year that makes us so busy, nearly frantically so? The imminent end of the school year certainly ratchets up the pace of life, but I wonder if there might be something else at play. The moon, the tides, the heavy dusting of oak pollen everywhere ...

No matter what the culprit, I feel like this at the end of each day.

Suffice to say, we're busy at Casa Fenner. PL1's birthday fete, complete with a houseful of Star Wars paraphernalia (in deference to his current obsession), is coming up this weekend. Editing and posting may be sparse in the meantime.

But last week, I entered all the marked changes on the hard copy of my manuscript and excised my beloved subplot. The manuscript now stands at 120,000 words! Woo hoo -- major goal reached!

This brings up an interesting and unexpected point: during my previous editing passes, I cut several scenes involving the main characters and main plotline. Most were little bits of characterization and dialogue that I loved, but was willing to sacrifice to the word count gods. I cut and pasted these little snippets into a separate document, appropriately titled "Dead Darlings."

I won't be getting a gold medal for my dead darlings, that's for sure. 

After cutting the subplot, I read through my Dead Darlings to see if any merited resurrection. Remarkably, these originally beloved snippets did not appeal to me anymore. Out of eight Dead Darlings, I only resurrected one. Cutting them in the first place practically caused me physical pain, but once they were gone I did not suffer in their absence.

My instincts were right, even as the writer in me mourned the loss of all that hard work. Separating my emotions about my work from my instinct about my work is a difficult, ongoing process. Editing has dragged this dichotomy to the forefront, and it's a bizarre thing to behold.

For now, I'm culling critical information from the dead subplot and inserting it into the main plot. Then I'll read over the entire manuscript again on my computer. Yeesh, editing seems to be taking as long as writing the book in the first place! Oh well, I hear summer's a good time to submit a manuscript to agents, anyway.